Oh the places you'll go

It's 1am in the morning and I'm sitting in my rocking chair with my beautiful 9 month old Emily sleeping in my arms it's the second time I have been up with her and if history repeats it self then it won't be the last in fact I will probably get another 2 or 3 chances to sit in the chair and hold her and some nights I am in tears exhausted wishing I could sleep for more than 2 hours at a time and some nights I blog and some nights I just FB stalk my friends and some nights I just bring her in bed next to me. (Except now I'm scared to do that since she fell off the other week...yeah I felt like the worst mom ever!) She us fine but now I'm back to the rocker and tonight it's cold and I have a lot on my mind. Which I'm sure many woman can relate to.

The last two weeks my husband has been studing for his last round of boards and this last weekend he took them! It was very long days of not seeing him and trying to keep up with a very energetic 2 year old and a I don't like to sleep much 9 month old. I was extremely nervous about these weeks to come and many times a day I found myself in my room door shut kneeling in prayer mainly for strength and patience. I am still amazed by how much my Father in Heaven is awear of me and my needs. Emily was sleeping better the weather was beautiful and made outdoor adventures/walks fun and angels dressed up like friends visited me, called, texted, and or hang out with me. I knew the only way I could survive these two weeks was if I started my week right...so I loaded the girls up for church and I'm greatful for the members and all their support and willingness to help me :) it truely takes a village! And we survived! The Lord answered my prayers!

 It's been a hard adjustment having two so close and one who doesn't like to sleep unless it's in my arms or right next to me but I know I wouldn't have it any other way. These precious girls bring so much joy into our home. The hard days much the good days that much better and I am so blessed to be their Mommy. Tonight I was putting K down for bed laying next to hear and she whispers "mama...mommy..." I whispered "what" back and she said 'I ove eww' and my heart just filled up with love and peace and joy and I kissed her forehead and said ' I love you too'  she then preceded to say mommy mama several times and state jibberish but it was super cute and I remember thinking Brittany take a mental note of this don't forget it. So hear I am it's 1:30 in the morning I'm holding my sweet 9 month old in my rocking chair blogging about her and her sister and how I know my Heavenly Father loves me. Life is busy and hard but it is so Beautiful!

What really matters

I love bedtime! It's a glorious time of day. Kensley is extra cuddling and it slap happy and just all together so sweet! Tonight bath time was fun like always she loves baths and now watches while the bath fills up with excitement and squeals!! It's just down right to cute! Then it's lotion massage, Jammie's, Storytime and then off to music land of sleepy dreams. Well lance and I will either share the bedtime routine or one of us will do it completely. Tonight Daddy had Storytime and music land aka cuddle time before she gets put in her crib. I have many moments where my heart melts when I see daddy and kensley together either playing or cuddling or reading a book tonight I had to capture the moment! I hope she knows how much her daddy loves her and when she gets older I hope she realizes he has loved her for forever! I am so blessed to be married to such a wonderful man who treats me like a queen but also be married to such a wonderful daddy to my children! I am forever in debt to his parents for raising such an amazing person!!

Mother's Day

Mother's Day has always been a rough day for me between the years of yearning to be a mom and being a mom to angel babies but not feeling like 'celebrating' because I didn't have my own baby in my arms to hold. Mother's Day to me is honoring the women who love like a mother.

My Aunt Judy never birthed a kid but she was a mother in my eyes. She was my second Mom she loved me as her own. I hope I can feel like a second Mom for my nieces and nephews because I love them as my own and would do anything for them.
This Mother's Day is the first one I feel like celebrating and am honored to be Kensleys Mother. Not a day goes by I don't thank Heavenly Father for her. I also don't go a day without praying for my sweet friends who are waiting for their own miracle baby. So for all the Women who have their own babies the women who are waiting and the women who love other children as their own Happy Mother's Day!