October 18, 2010

PCOS....

This last week has been a rough one. I don't like to talk much about my PCOS and my Infertility problems and honestly I don't really know why cause I'm not a very private person as most of you know and I enjoy reading other blogs about women who are in the same boat makes me feel like I'm not on a deserted Island of infertity by myself. I would never wish Infertility on anyone. Its probably the hardest trial I have had to face in my life so far but it has also been a complete blessing as well. (believe its taken me a while to come to grip that its a blessing)
I understand that for Me and Lance Sex does not get us Pregnant! ( lol just a little infertility joke) We joke around about how there is something else that those who have kids don't tell the rest of us. I have to sometimes take a step back and look at the full picture and try to see the silver lining while sometimes its harder on some days. I know that there is a reason. January marks the 3 year mark of "trying to make babies"

Now although I so badly wish I was pregnant and a mommy by now I have enjoyed every moment I have had with my Dear Husband Lance :) I would not trade these years we have had together for anything :) I can say that. I can say to myself to enjoy the time I have with my Husband....for those who can have babies don't tell your friends who can't to "enjoy the time they have with out kids" cause once you have kids its never the same. To put it nicely it makes me ( and I'm sure many others who are having trouble getting pregnant) want to slap you in the Face.... and I mean that in the nicest way. Its are hard thing to try to say the right words to comfort your friends that are having problems just be honest and tell them "that sucks and you have no idea what we are going through but to stay positive" :)
don't try to pawn you kids off to us ya know that phrase "You Can Have One Of Mine" Really...REALLY! You may think its funny and I may laugh or smile to make YOU feel good but to put it nicely...It makes me want to punch you in your Ovaries. seriously I mean that in the nicest way. Telling us you would be fine with giving your precious child to us cause you have so many is like slapping us in the face and laughing at us cause we can't have kids. If you don't know what its like to go through the Fertility problems (I don't mean that it took you under a year to get preggers cause News flash thats Normal. ) I mean you seriously don't have some issue's going on.....don't try to imagine what it would be like cause you can't (and I don't want you to try its not fun) just like i can't imagine what it would be like to just"look" at my husband and get pregnant.

However this in no way means that just casue you are pregnant you should feel bad about it around your infertity friends. Lets be honest Women We should be Happy for our friends who get to expirence the miracle of life and no matter what their situation is We as infertile women should not think that they don't deserve to be pregnant. that is not our place. I am always so happy to hear of my friends getting pregnant whether it be a triumph miracle do to Docs saying the chance were low or to the sweethearts who are blessed with Super Fertile eggs :) Its a beautiful time for that couple and EXCITING NEWS!

Yes sometimes its hard to know that your not preggers and others around you are but I wouldn't trade my life with them. I am so happy where I am and SOOOOOO blessed by my Heavenly Father for the blessings in my life and for a wonderful Husband and job and home and this list could go on and on and on and on. I feel blessed to have an understanding of infertility so that I can possible help my friends who are as well in our journey to become Mommys.

So for all those Mommys out their Hold your little ones a little longer each night for the Mommy's to be like me who don't have their little ones yet and for those who might never have their little ones. Love them just a little bit more and try to enjoy those "crazy days". Becasue as strange as it is us Mommys to be would do anything humanly possible to have those "crazy days".

ok my rant is over I feel better now :) sorry for this long post but it is my Blog so I guess its ok :) lol Congrats to all those new Mommy's and to all the soon to be mommy's :) I am truely so happy for you all.

7 comments:

Cody and Danica said...

I hope things get better for you guys. One day Heavenly Father will bless you babies. Cody has 2 cousins that both had/have that and they got pregnant when they lesat expected it so I know there's always hope. I really believe you're on the right track when you recognize it as a trial and not just a "why me?" ya know. Heavenly Father blesses those that are patient. Keep smiling girl. I hope I made sense and didn't sound like an idiot (cuz I do that alot)

jack+alli said...

AMEN! you said it all so well! i remember those days like it was yesterday, but then at the same time it feels like such a long time ago. i would relive all the years we were TTC a hundred times over just to have this sweet miracle again. i cant say what its like for people who get pregnant the first try, but for me i appreciate this babe and the miracle of life a million times more because he took so long to get here, and i know you'll feel the same way.
i cant wait for your babies to start coming, no matter how they come, you will be a GREAT mommy i can already tell!
xoxo

Heather said...

Brittany, first off, I love you. You are a great women and I'm so happy that you and your hubby are still so inlove! I don't know if this is what you want to hear but I'm telling you that there is hope. When I was told I had PCOS, my heart sank into my stomach, my eyes became wet and I felt doomed to never have my own little babes. I was devistated that haveing babies was going to be a big struggle and hated the fact that immature teen girls were haveing babies all the time. After I had my moment of self pitty, I tried really hard to not let this get me down and realize that there are women out there with the same diognosis and have been blessed with there own babes.

I won't keep rambling on but needless to say, I am a woman with PCOS and God has so graciously blessed me with 2 babes. I thank Him every day for it!

Please don't take this as me rubbing it in because that is not my intent at all. I just want you to know that no matter what the docs say, EVERYTHING is in Gods hands and to not give up. You very well could have your very own "mini me's" in the future!

There is hope! You are a strong faithful daughter of God and I know he will bless you for it!

Wendi and Matt said...

I am sorry for your struggle. I can not relate but have had many trials with my little man and keep telling myself this too shall pass. You are amazing and hope you can be a mommy soon!

Ashlee G. said...

Perfectly said.

Having PCOS and struggling with infertility has been the single most difficult trial of my life. But I often think that Heavenly Father decided this was the trial for me because he knew I could somehow handle it. Trust me though, sometimes I hardly think I can.

Infertiltity is a stinky thing that I wish nobody had to deal with.

Love you Britt and thanks for always being there for me!

McGee said...

you Ladies are so sweet! Danica you didn't sound like an idot i love hearing those stories! no worries Heather I don't feel like you are rubbing it in my face! i love hearing stories like that it gives me hope :) Wendi you are such a great Mommy! and your little guy is so blessed to have you! I love you all so much! and I love it when my friends get pregant i can't tell you how much i truely wish women didn't have to go through all this infertility and am so happy for the ones who don't have too. Allison you are truely amazing to me and thank you for always listening and letting me feel comfortable about my situation. you have helped me in more then you realize :)

Brad & Darcy Ellis said...

I cannot tell you how much I love your post!! Britt I feel the exact same way I just don't ever say it :( We are just about to hit our 4 year mark of "trying to make babies" and I totally understand every word you are saying! Love you girl!! I miss seeing your face all the time, can I request a transfer back to us? Hang in there, there is definitely a reason we are all going through this, some day we will understand. Oh and have you tried metformin yet? Just curious...