This last week has been a rough one. I don't like to talk much about my PCOS and my Infertility problems and honestly I don't really know why cause I'm not a very private person as most of you know and I enjoy reading other blogs about women who are in the same boat makes me feel like I'm not on a deserted Island of infertity by myself. I would never wish Infertility on anyone. Its probably the hardest trial I have had to face in my life so far but it has also been a complete blessing as well. (believe its taken me a while to come to grip that its a blessing)
I understand that for Me and Lance Sex does not get us Pregnant! ( lol just a little infertility joke) We joke around about how there is something else that those who have kids don't tell the rest of us. I have to sometimes take a step back and look at the full picture and try to see the silver lining while sometimes its harder on some days. I know that there is a reason. January marks the 3 year mark of "trying to make babies"
Now although I so badly wish I was pregnant and a mommy by now I have enjoyed every moment I have had with my Dear Husband Lance :) I would not trade these years we have had together for anything :) I can say that. I can say to myself to enjoy the time I have with my Husband....for those who can have babies don't tell your friends who can't to "enjoy the time they have with out kids" cause once you have kids its never the same. To put it nicely it makes me ( and I'm sure many others who are having trouble getting pregnant) want to slap you in the Face.... and I mean that in the nicest way. Its are hard thing to try to say the right words to comfort your friends that are having problems just be honest and tell them "that sucks and you have no idea what we are going through but to stay positive" :)
don't try to pawn you kids off to us ya know that phrase "You Can Have One Of Mine" Really...REALLY! You may think its funny and I may laugh or smile to make YOU feel good but to put it nicely...It makes me want to punch you in your Ovaries. seriously I mean that in the nicest way. Telling us you would be fine with giving your precious child to us cause you have so many is like slapping us in the face and laughing at us cause we can't have kids. If you don't know what its like to go through the Fertility problems (I don't mean that it took you under a year to get preggers cause News flash thats Normal. ) I mean you seriously don't have some issue's going on.....don't try to imagine what it would be like cause you can't (and I don't want you to try its not fun) just like i can't imagine what it would be like to just"look" at my husband and get pregnant.
However this in no way means that just casue you are pregnant you should feel bad about it around your infertity friends. Lets be honest Women We should be Happy for our friends who get to expirence the miracle of life and no matter what their situation is We as infertile women should not think that they don't deserve to be pregnant. that is not our place. I am always so happy to hear of my friends getting pregnant whether it be a triumph miracle do to Docs saying the chance were low or to the sweethearts who are blessed with Super Fertile eggs :) Its a beautiful time for that couple and EXCITING NEWS!
Yes sometimes its hard to know that your not preggers and others around you are but I wouldn't trade my life with them. I am so happy where I am and SOOOOOO blessed by my Heavenly Father for the blessings in my life and for a wonderful Husband and job and home and this list could go on and on and on and on. I feel blessed to have an understanding of infertility so that I can possible help my friends who are as well in our journey to become Mommys.
So for all those Mommys out their Hold your little ones a little longer each night for the Mommy's to be like me who don't have their little ones yet and for those who might never have their little ones. Love them just a little bit more and try to enjoy those "crazy days". Becasue as strange as it is us Mommys to be would do anything humanly possible to have those "crazy days".
ok my rant is over I feel better now :) sorry for this long post but it is my Blog so I guess its ok :) lol Congrats to all those new Mommy's and to all the soon to be mommy's :) I am truely so happy for you all.