September 4, 2012
For me I don't think I have unrealistic expectations on what Motherhood is going to be. I don't think its going to be a breeze or that my baby will be perfect and never cry and sleep through the night from day one or behave perfect 24/7. I know My life will change in so many ways! I know there will be sleepless nights and times when I will wonder if I'm doing it right or being a Good Mom. I have spent a fair share of watching kiddos and lots of talks with Mothers and their stories and their experiences. but I also know there are those sweet moments of Motherhood too.
So it makes me laugh when people ask when baby will here and I tell them and say how I wish she was already here...and no joke almost every lady says " Enjoy your sleep now cause when that baby comes you won't get much of it"..I've had 24 years to enjoy my sleep...and News flash I'm 9 months preggers "enjoying" sleep is pretty much out of the question and I'm okay with that! It means finally i'm not sleeping cause their is a human being growing inside of me waiting to enter this beautiful world! I would take these kinds of sleepless nights instead of the ones in Tears over a lost baby or frustration for not having a baby or being pregnant and having to see that negative pregnancy test for the 1000th time and wondering why I can't get pregnant or why we don't have a baby yet....Those are nights that suck! I've waited 4+ years to have sleepless nights with a baby! BRING IT ON!!!
You see for me in those nights when I've been in tears wondering when my sweet miracle will come I've poured my heart out to Heavenly Father asking him to give me these sleepless nights! I've prayed for morning sickness, for sleepless nights with a baby, a messy house full of toys and little hand prints on mirrors and sliding doors and appliances, for kids to get into the toilet paper, make up, lotion, vaseline, bedtime stories with my own kids, sweet moments of rocking my baby to sleep.
I'm sure I sound crazy to a lot of you for praying for that but that's the difference for me. When those women who have prayed for those days to go quickly so a new day can start. I've prayed for those days to come. Everyone has their own life experiences and mine have brought me here. I have prayed for these days for years now and I'm ready to experience all the joys that come with being a Mom and taking care of my own baby. So yes I'm ready to have a baby and be a Mom and learn the whole new meaning of being exhausted and tired! It won't last forever and like the poem says " babies don't keep" so I plan on embracing and enjoying every moment with my baby even those hard nights or days or weeks or months. Bring it on!